The Same River Twice: second section

Overall, this section of reading proved that Chris is steadily becoming more and more ready to start parenthood, while in the past he is still trying to find himself.

The first few pages starts in the present, revealing some of the meaning behind the title of the book. "Sediment drifts away and it occurs to me that you can't even step on the same bank twice. Each footstep alters the earth" (55). When I first heard the title of this book, I thought it was a journey of a man who spent his life travelling, but never visited the same river twice. But, I know everyone has had that feeling at the beach in which your feet become heavily buried in the sand beneath the water. Where does this sand drift to? Where does it land? The river would never again have the same composition. That is some deep thinking. I love it. I wonder if expectant fathers really do think about things like this: "If it turns out to be a terrorist, the fault will be environmental, not genetic" (58). Just the mere thought of your unborn child being a terrorist is a little far-fetched, but I assume that would be a natural worry as to what kind of social life your child would have when they are older. I didn't really understand the Oedipus analysis near the end of this section, but it was a play I enjoyed in high school.

"Lacking plan or destination, I was at last content" (59). It seems as though when people, especially me, make plans, they always fall through and then disappointment sets in. I have learned that in college, I do not need a plan or destination to be happy. I am simply appreciating life for what it is. There were a lot of witty lines throughout the flashback--things like: "[s]he raised us, but Dad controlled us", "[d]uring cold weather bums and birds headed south". I just like how Offutt could be so realistic with his choice of words. One particular line that caught my attention was the homosexual, black guy in Nebraska. He said this: "[my] single regret was being born black in the South" (66). I have heard this somewhere, not in this context, but those words triggered a vague memory. Another thought-provoking line was found on page 68. "From my vantage alone in the Rockies, centrality always seemed elsewhere". First, standing alone in a landform such as the Rockies is humbling all by itself. Secondly, everyone's perception in life is different. From different vantage points, we all have a different central life focus. We have one major life goal, and we get through each day just to see the reward of the major goal. Sometimes we lose sight of that goal, and "wonder if [we are] actually running away, not toward" (71). When living a life where your "brother and sister are also [your] cousins" (70) you might want to explore and live on the edge.

The biblical references from pages 72-76 are quite controversial. I do not know if I completely agree with them, especially in Offutt's choice of words here: "even God let his son die" (73). I do not like the use of the word "let". But, hey it's his book, and his opinion. I feel that he is disrespecting Christianity on page 75 when he says that "Jesus performed the dream of many men". This might affect how I view the rest of the memoir.

It's quite ironic how after the whole disregard to Christianity, he picks up Al. During this part of the memoir is when I asked myself if all of this truly happened or if it was an exaggeration like we talked about in class. Al said alot of important things, but the most important was " 'Don't trust men who smoke a pipe' " (80). And what does Chris do? Haha. More on that later. But, I also thought it was maybe a hint of foreshadowing when the purebred spider "crawl[ed] back into the safety of its glass chapel". Winner was the next guy that gave him a ride. Although, I am not sure if it was smoked in a pipe, he was still addicted to crystal Meth. Winner was a definite loser! He had "liberation pills" ready to take his life at any moment, was putting on some lie about a scooter for his mom, and was a racist. But, Chris is weary about Winner grouping them in the same category under one word: "us". This simple two letter word was "the most frightening word heard uttered in a lifetime of conversation with strangers" (84). Strangers, people that he did not know from Adam, were all of a sudden saying "us" as if they had been friends since the sandbox. Can you say awkward? I love the paragraph following this, though. It is beautifully written, especially: "Us implied a tem, and all thems were ripe for destruction". This must have been my favorite section, because I have more. Chris goes to the homeless shelter, where he states that: "all of us denied that we were truly homeless. Every converstation began with the past success, then skipped to the future. The present was never mentioned...Talk was defense" (85). This is something people do all the time! About relationships or finances or whatever have you. I'm glad someone has put this into words so honestly. "Morality was trivial" (86). Wow. That got my attention. After thinking someone was picking up his artwork to glorify it, then watching the man put it in the garbage, I would be down on life as well.

Barney didn't smoke tobacco, but he sure did chew it. What is up with Chris and these drug abusers? I personally think he should listen to Al even though he is a little radical. I am not a fan of this whole circus section with the Parrot Lady and male genitals. It was a bore. But, I did like the oxymoron dropped on page 94 "complex simplicity". I may have to use that one day. After quitting the job, Chris has accomplished nothing, because he is still searching for himself. He knows that he doesn't belong in any particular group, now all he has to do is find middle ground.